An Empty Room

One night before bed, my heart was filled with these words, so I wrote them down in a pseudo poem. The intention is not to be a fancy, formal poem, but more to just bear my heart and share with you all.

-------------------------------------------------------

An Empty Room

An empty room. An empty womb.

When the sun sets on your plans

Leaving your dreams unfulfilled

You must choose.

How will you face the night?

How will you face the day?

Time will pass. Life will go on.

With or without you.

With or without your heart's desires.

You feel left behind.

Stuck in time.

Unable to move on.

Not understanding why.

Not understanding why not.

You must choose.

How will you pass the time?

How will you endure the wait?

Whose voice will you listen to?

Whose light will you follow?

Choose wisely, dear one.

For only one path leads to truth.

Only one path is straight.

Only one leaves you full.

Full of peace.

Full of love.

Full of joy.

Full of hope.

Let the light of the Lord

Show you the way.

Do not despair.

Your prayers are heard.

Your every hair is numbered.

Your every tear is collected.

You are never alone

When you have the Lord in your heart.

You are never hopeless

When you know who you are

And to Whom you belong.

A childless woman. No.

A failure and broken. No.

Unworthy and guilty. No.

A child of God. Most surely, yes.

Cling to the Truth

With every bit of strength you possess.

Run to your Savior

And never, ever forget.

One day your time will come.

One day your tears will cease.

One day your heart will overflow

Because one day your room will be full.

Hope & Love,
Christine

A New Year, A New View

As I mentioned previously, I signed up to receive these daily devotionals specific to those struggling with infertility. They have been a huge encouragement to me. I would like to share another one that may encourage you as well. Read on, soak it in, and I pray this new year is full of joy and recognizing God's blessings in your life.

Looking Ahead-Your View of Infertility JANUARY 2, 2013

Today we will wrap up our discussion of changes we can make in this new year to help us in our struggle with infertility.  Many people have gone back to work and back to the day to day routines of life.  Some have already forgotten their new year’s resolutions and have fallen back into old habits.  Some never made an effort to break the destructive patterns in the first place!  Today, I encourage you to make a change in how you view your infertility.   How have you looked at your inability to conceive?  There is no doubt it is a devastating life crisis.  For those who have never experienced the crushing blow of an infertility diagnosis, delayed or denied pregnancy may seem like little more than a passing inconvenience.  However, for those who live in infertility’s shadow every moment of every day, baby hunger can be an all-consuming dread and heartache.  Is it a punishment?  Is infertility God’s way of letting you know you have wronged Him?  Has God chosen to show His anger or disappointment in you by closing your womb tighter than Fort Knox?  How should you view your infertility? Go with me to the days of the Old Testament and take a seat next to our sister in waiting, Hannah.  Let me tell you, she would be more than qualified to lead our support group this month!     She cried buckets and buckets of tears as she begged God for a baby, yet no baby came.  She watched others around her conceive.  She even watched her husband’s other wife conceive babies for her own husband, and raise his children in her home.  Can you imagine seeing a pregnant woman in your home, bearing children for your husband?  As she wept in the temple, petitioning God for a pregnancy, she was accused of being drunk.  Hannah understood all the frustrating aspects of infertility. Here’s the point:  In 1 Samuel 1 where the story of Hannah is shared with us, there are two separate occasions where we see the phrase “the LORD had closed her womb”.  There is no question as to why Hannah was not a mother.  The answer is clear: the Lord closed her womb!  If the Lord closes your womb, it is closed.  Hannah’s infertility was not an accident.  God did it on purpose.  The first time I really paid attention to this phrase, I must admit, it made me mad!  I wanted to believe that Hannah was having a problem conceiving and that God rushed in like a knight on a white stallion and saved the day.  Wrong!  God closed her womb.  He did it on purpose!  I didn’t want to believe that God did this to her?  Why?  Because if God did this to her, maybe He did this to me, too. But wait!  Here’s the good part.  If God did this on purpose, then Hannah’s infertility--and yours--must have a great purpose!  I don’t believe God allows something as life changing as infertility to haphazardly interrupt the flow of someone’s life for absolutely no reason.  We know infertility doesn’t catch an omniscient God by surprise.  I believe infertility in your life has a holy purpose.  God will use it to reach you and to teach you things you never could have learned outside of infertility’s classroom.   Even before the conception and birth of Samuel, Hannah praised God through her trials and dark days.  Was that the lesson she learned?  Was that the purpose?  Maybe we can ask her one day.  Her story has strengthened untold millions of infertile women through the centuries.  That would be a great purpose for what she went through.  Who know what all God did through her battle with infertility.  Who knows what He’ll do with yours! Change your view of infertility.  Don’t let the enemy convince you that it is something that has happened to you because God is angry with you or that He has forgotten you.  Infertility has a purpose.  God will use it in ways you can never imagine today.